Creating Thankfulness In Your Marriage | Nov-Dec

So much of our dissatisfaction with life is of our own making.

It revolves around our thinking – where we focus our attention.

We saw this attitude a number of years ago with Yvonne. It seemed to happen when she would go shopping. Whenever she would walk into the home decorating section of a department store she would find herself feeling dissatisfied with the way our home was decorated. All she could focus on was all the things she did not have. By the time she got home she would look around with a critical eye and then state with a critical mouth everything that was wrong with the house. Unfortunately it did not stop with just the house. Soon she would turn her critical eye towards Bob and it would seem he could not do anything right.

This dissatisfaction seemed to permeate all of her thinking for a couple of days. It would then calm down until she went shopping again. Bob knew dealing with life this way was a dead end for Yvonne and the marriage, so he lovingly confronted her and suggested working on this together.

A verse we took to heart during this time is found in 1 Thessalonians 5:18,?”Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” It is saying that we need to have an attitude of thankfulness in everything because God is the supplier of everything we need in our life. What He gives us is enough. And that even in difficult circumstances, like a marriage or a family that is not headed where you want, He knows what you need and will provide it. We just need to thank and trust God.

We realized that having an attitude of thankfulness can become a way of life and it needs to be cultivated. We came up with a plan that has helped change our thinking.

Cultivating Thankfulness

1. Create a thanksgiving list
To help change our focus we agreed to write down the myriad of ways God has blessed us. We created a Blessing List under several categories: Finances, Health, Family, Friends, Possessions, Work, Church and Community. One of the first items on our list was the variety of furnishings in our home. We found that nearly every piece of furniture had a story behind it as to how God provided it, particularly at times when we had so little money. Once we had made the list we made it a point to frequently read over it and thank God for each item we had written down. This was especially helpful when dissatisfaction with some ‘thing’ or some ‘one’ would crop up. Reading our list would change our focus. We would then be reminded of the many, many blessings we really had.

2. Start your day with a prayer of thanksgiving
We start our day by reading something in the book of Psalms. Some of our favorites are: Psalm 107:1-2, Psalm 28:7, Psalm 139:14, Psalm 105:1-2, and Psalm 100:4-5. After reading, we then pray and thank God for another day He has given us and ask Him to make us alert to all the blessings He will place before us. It is amazing how starting the day being thankful changes your perspective on how you deal with everything you encounter that day.

3. End the day by counting your blessings
Keep a “Blessings Journal” and spend five minutes a day writing down how God blessed you that day. Could be the phone call you got from an old friend, your child making the bus on time, or the sweet smell of an apple pie cooking. You get the idea.

4. Say thank you often
Let the people around you know how you appreciate them. It could be your mate, children, parents, co-workers, friends, neighbors. Call them or write them (a handwritten letter is a lost art these days and it is always a surprise to receive and appreciated), or text them, or Email them and tell them. Make it an ongoing habit. It will make a big difference in their lives as well as yours. Also when God has blessed you remember to thank him and do not forget to tell someone else what He has done.

When you start feel like something in your life is not enough, look for things to be thankful for. It will change your focus and you will then see how many blessings you really have!

And to be sure that you have Peace With God we would like to encourage you to visit www.billygraham.org and then click on Spiritual Help followed by clicking on Steps To Peace With God. You may want to share this link with family and friends.

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