The beginning of a new year is always a good time in our family to d-clutter our house. It begins as we put away the Christmas decorations for another year and ends with us going through cupboards, closets and that dreaded monster known as the garage, and get rid of items we neither want or need. Our annual house d-cluttering always makes us feel more energized and ready to tackle a new year. Does it YOU?

A few years ago knowing how good we felt after our home was cleaned-out, we decided to do the same with our personal lives and more particularly our marriage.

We realized that many things came into our lives each year that only cluttered it and oftentimes got us side-tracked from where God wanted to lead us with our marriage. Because of this fact, we have established a routine that we do at the beginning of every year that helps energize our marriage.

We find a night early in the month where we can spend a couple of uninterrupted hours together and ask each other three questions. As we discuss our answers we keep in mind a verse found in Ephesians 5:15-16, “Live life with a due sense of responsibility, not as those who do not know the meaning of life but as those who do. Make the best use of your time….”

Question #1

What areas worked for us this past year and do we want to continue them?

We discuss a variety of areas of our life which include the financial, physical, spiritual, sexual and relational. Starting with the “good news” always gives us encouragement about what we are doing right in our relationship and that which we can build upon.

Here’s a small but powerfully loving example of what worked for us last year and we will continue. When we pass each other in the hallway, or when one was leaving to run an errand, we pause and exchange three kisses and say, “I love you” ? and express those words in various ways. This causes us to focus on the moment and on each other.

Discuss what has worked for you two and do you want to continue it?

Question #2

What areas did NOT work for us this past year, why, and do we want to do something differently?

This is the question that really gets you thinking about the things that may have cluttered your marriage and you want them tweaked a bit or totally cleaned out.

At the beginning of last year we decided that we were going to have a date once a week as well as put aside a couple of days every three months to have much needed “down time” – but guess what? You guessed it. We did not do it. Well, just a tad on rare occasions but nothing like we hoped to do. Oh sure we talked a lot about it but didn’t discipline ourselves to follow through. So our too-busy life took over and pushed out time for us to just enjoy each other.

This year we definitely are going to do something about it by scheduling ourselves first on our calendar. By making our relationship a priority we know it will greatly benefit our marriage.

Question #3

Is there anything new we want to add this year?

As we discussed these areas of our marriage and family we decided to just add one new activity in our life as we did not want to overwhelm ourselves.

We have decided to take up tennis again. We used to play many years ago and enjoyed it but then got out of the habit. So in 2014 it is “Wimbledon ? Here We Come.”

How About You?

We encourage you to pose these trio of questions to each other and then, “Make your plans counting on God to direct you.” (Proverbs 16:9)

We pray for you to have a healthy, happy and holy 2014 – and that our Lord will continue His good work in you and through you, and that you will stay faithful to your love and obedience to Him, and will continue living each day in preparation for His return.